Author Archives: laurismith88

Believing the lies today. Know the truth.  Doesn’t matter. Believing the lies anyway. They are swirling all around me in a feeding frenzy. Feeding on each other and growing stronger and darker and louder. Yet they aren’t shouting. That would be wasted energy. They whisper. Inept. Incapable.  Inadequate.  Incompetent.  Inferior. And the whispers echo everywhere.Continue reading “Believing lies. Knowing Truth.”

More on my current season – this difficult chapter in my twisting turning up down and around life’s journey. Even without details, I hope that many can identify with the struggle.  What it feels like when moving forward involves changing direction while still trying to keep the focus on the goal.  What it really meansContinue reading “Close your eyes and see”

I’m terrible at sports. Any sport.  Not athletic at all.  In P.E. at school, always last to be picked for a team.  Seriously.  Because I had this reputation which was quite accurate: I was a liability to a winning game.  Yes, I’m gifted in a few other areas, but definitely not here. So. There’s this thing I’veContinue reading “A Game of Catch”

Unsettled. Uncertain.  Confused.  Lost.  Hurt.  Angry.  Sad.  Why?  After all, I know the Answers. Yes, I know the right Answers, as I read over and reflect on Biblical truths. But there’s this Grand Canyon sized gap.  Between my daily reality and the Answers.  I’m on one side looking across the canyon at the other side,Continue reading “The Waiting Quest”

Trying and failing. Again. At times when I allow my mind to tread silently down that path and look I see that others make it work And work so beautifully I know I should not compare But it seems that they have that Something That has for so long been unattainable to me. So muchContinue reading “The Battering Ram”

God and I have been in this dialogue for quite some time. As He shapes and molds me and works me over, as I struggle and fight and yearn for release even though I’m free already, as I question and ponder and analyze from every angle and strive, so hard, to understand… When I’m reallyContinue reading “Obedience Training”

God spoke to me. No, not audibly.  But there were words flying around in my mind.  Words about a variety of recent events and reactions and everything I’ve heard and read.  God took me on a little side trip to show me what’s really happening.  I see.  Oh, how I see.  This is what was placed upon my heart this morning.  I choose to share whatContinue reading “The Sad Happy Celebration”

More transparency from me.  A sequel of sorts.  And well, since I’m detail obsessed and orderly by nature,  “Part 2” has to follow “Part 1”, right?   If you know me, you are smiling right now.  Glad to see that smile.  🙂 So yes, there was a season of sadness.  There was prayer to shift my focusContinue reading “A Sudden Dawning”

A time for transparency. A season of sadness.  We all have them.  Sometimes a tragedy, a crisis, will rock our world and a new and unexpected season slams upon us with the force of a tornado.  But other times, there can be a gradual dawning of a time of darkness.  For me, this is one of thoseContinue reading “A Gradual Dawning”

About a month ago I shared some very personal writing here on my blog.  And it seems only fitting that I would share this as well – Part 2 – the learning and growing part.  “Hope Springs Eternal” is a famous quote that is true, but only the right kind of hope.  Our hope mustContinue reading “That one thing… Part 2”